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LuciusDickusMaximus Archive

/r/ProRevenge

Neighbor tricked me into celebrating NYE a day early so I’m sneaking alcohol to minors at his party then calling the cops

/r/TrueOffMyChest

My child thought he heard Santa when it was actually my mistress

/r/Showerthoughts

A career in lifeguarding seems a dangerous choice as most don’t seem to live past their teens.

/r/Showerthoughts

Lifeguarding is probably very dangerous career given that an old lifeguard is a rare sight.

/r/mildlyinfuriating

This is why I don’t do one night stands before sentimental holidays

/r/u_LuciusDickusMaximus

[r/NoStupidQuestions] Why is celebrating Christmas considered offensive nowadays?

/r/u_LuciusDickusMaximus

[r/The10thDentist] I relish being socially ostracized.

/r/Showerthoughts

It is possible that you have run someone over and just didn’t notice

/r/The10thDentist

I relish being socially ostracized.

/r/TrueOffMyChest

I got so hungry at work I ate every single person’s lunch, and everyone blamed the janitor